I thought it was about time I let you in on a little family secret. Spurred on by several Cool Grape drinks *cough - the best thing ever* and an entire weekend dedicated to watching the Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Scott and I officially renamed one of our guinea pigs. There was a ceremony and a wetting of heads which was largely the result of me dribbling a bit of alcohol on Ralph. Or so that's what I'll tell my lawyer if anyone misinterprets my top notch sarcasm as an admission of animal cruelty.
Okay, I don't know how we ended up here, let's backtrack. First of all, I feel like I need to justify myself for binge-watching Lord of the Rings. I don't know what I was doing. I was pissed out of my life which is three steps beyond being pissed out of your mind and so you know shit was critical. I've become at one with the Finnish drinking culture. We've grown an appreciation of one another. Plus let's face it, there really isn't much else to do anyway. Now, if you're unfamiliar with Lord of the Rings, what you're about to see won't make much sense but Scott and I came to the conclusion that Ralph's hobbit counterpart was Samwise Gamgee, Frodo's trusty sidekick. See for yourself...
And so from that day forth, it was decided that Ralph's formal title should be Ralphwise Gamgee of the Pigshire. Mr Gamgee for short and Ralphwise for when we have guests.
P.S. I really need to get out more.
P.P.S. I think my art teacher would be super proud of this.
P.P.P.S I don't actually have a lawyer so please don't sue me.